I don’t own a leotard…

I have not written about this yet … I’ve set my quit smoking date.

Bette never did but I gotta…

I’ve been making a lot of positive changes in my life.

  • I’m walking more.
  • I take the stairs and not the elevator. In fact, I climbed six flights recently — usually I do just two or maybe three.
  • I’m eating better and I’ve lost some weight too.
  • I’m thinking more positively.
  • I’ve taken up yoga — ok, that’s a lie. But you get the idea … I’m trying.

But yet I smoke. Not as much as I used to. I used to smoke a pack a day and now I usually smoke about a pack every 5 days. I say every five days because I mostly smoke at work and not at home and not much at all (if any) on the weekends.

I want to stop smoking. I’m getting older and I don’t feel as healthy as I used to. Plus, smoking aggravates my GERD. I want to be fit.

I’m cute as a button now but I won’t be forever if I keep smoking. Any day now it will catch up with me…

It’s hard because I have an obsessive compulsive and addictive personality. Plus I love smoking. I admit it — I love it.

I don’t want to feel tense anymore if there are only a few left in the pack — I don’t want to think about the damn pack. I don’t want to worry about my health. I want to take up running— again I jest. But who knows what I’ll get up to. Speed walking? Dancercize?

My (dumb-assed) fear is that things won’t be as fun anymore. That’s sounds nuts but I’ve read it’s quite common to feel this way. I’ve been reading a lot. The bottom line is that I’m ready.

Sorta. I hope. Oh, man …

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