a secret alteration conspiracy

So I’m out shopping and I’m looking at some pants that catch my eye. (This happens almost as often as I purchase new footwear). Before I try them on, I like to hold them against me (to see how they might look) and they almost always come up to my eyebrows.


The average North American woman is 5’4″. I’m not quite 5’4″ but I don’t walk around with waistbands and belt buckles at eye level either.

Who is wearing these super-long pants? Who are these giants? My theory is that there’s no real market for these garments. It is, in fact, a secret conspiracy dreamed up by drycleaners.

While not a deeply sinister plot, it’s annoying nonetheless.


  1. I think that perhaps you should come to grips with the fact that you’re sh… sho… not tall.

  2. For the record I am 5″1’… Not tall – short even. But do we not deserve nice pants?

  3. let’s not get started on clothes … the list of ‘things and drive me nuts so I try to ignore them” includes many, many clothing issues.

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