The Grup inside me lives on…I am still very uneasy and slightly confused about just what it means to be an adult in these modern times. Today I went to a wedding shower and even my younger cousins seemed older than me. And the ladies (ladies!) my age all seemed so much older and conservative. My younger cousins seemed older and conservative too. It was just a bizarre Sunday afternoon. I felt like Pink among a sea of Macedonian folk singers.
Living downtown makes me suspect but I embraced that long ago. At least I knew what to wear and I arrived in nice Macedonian lady garb. My Capri pants revealed my tattoo but thankfully none of the ladies pointed it out — this time.
And then there’s the cheek pinching. One would think this would end by the time one’s approaching 40 but no such luck. My poor cheeks got pinched and pinched again. I imagine it’s good for the circulation at least.
It did not help that the event was deep in the suburbs and this made me feel even more uneasy. I did not have the comfort of buildings and noise all around me. There was no subway for miles and the buses run every hour up there. Way too much grass too.
But all in all it was a nice event. My cousin got tons of presents and she seemed very happy and radiant. I got to gossip with my aunt who always like to sit beside me and throw shade. She’s funny and fun. When I look in the mirror, I often see this aunt peering back at me — we have the same eyes and the same expressions. Mind you, she often refers to herself in the third person and I have not started to do that but I imagine there’s time yet.
Fun times in the suburbs.