a new pair of very hot pink pajamas

I have a new pair of pink pajamas made out of polar fleece. They’re really cute and very warm. All in all, they were a good purchase except for the fact that they wake me up in the middle of the night on a regular basis because I think I’m aflame.

I’m no physicist but polar fleece does something weird if you roll around in it — it sets the sheets on fire! Well, maybe that’s not the scientific explanation but it creates sparks — bright blue electrical sparks — in your bedclothes. Sparks that make you leap out of bed half asleep thinking you went to bed with a defective heating pad with a rusty cord. (I threw that out, really.)

The sparks are quite something and I wonder why this energy source has not been harnessed to help save our non-renewable resources. Giant polar fleece turbines could power our city and save us millions.

Why is no one on this? To whom do I send this proposal? I’d be willing to sacrifice my new pajamas for the cause.


  1. Scientists have been unable to harness this energy but instead have developed a technique to combat it — it is called BOUNCE.

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