Category: Life

I don’t hear very well. It’s not a big deal as I’ve learned to cope — I speech read, I wear hearing aids and I use a special wireless device to talk on the phone. (The device makes me sound like I’m in a well but it’s better than the alternative — email only.)

Many people (who don’t know me well) are often shocked to learn how bad my hearing is. I could not function very well in the hearing world if I did not wear hearing aids. I definitely could not do my job, watch TV (I need CC even with my aids) or go to movies.

But with hearing aids I am fine — at least usually. Not today.

Today I almost got beaned by one of those earth-friendly no-gas cars that don’t make any noise. (Well, they must make some noise but not enough…I’ll explain.)

I was walking in the lane behind my house this morning and I turned around because I thought I saw something out of the corner of my eye. As I was turning, I realized it was a car moving rather swiftly — and silently — just inches from me.

It shook me up a bit. I don’t like to jaywalk because of my hearing but I was just a few feet from my door when this happened.

I didn’t give the guy the finger because a) I prefer to swear and b) because there was no way he could have known that I could not hear him. Not to mention that I did step out of my path a bit unpredictably.

Still.

All cars in my world should be diesel and/or equipped with faulty mufflers.

“Research into tobacco dependence published online today (Friday 17 October 2008) in the November issue of Addiction, has shown that recent ex-smokers who find exposure to other people’s cigarette smoke pleasant are not any more likely to relapse than those who find it unpleasant.”

But what about those of us who find it both pleasant and unpleasant at the very same time? That’s me. I smell cigarettes and I feel an overwhelming desire to light up coupled with an equally overwhelming desire to escape the foul smell.

I think this must have something to do with the fact that I was hypnotized. Maybe that’s why I also whack myself in the head with the loofah when I’m taking a shower.