Category: Life

I don’t listen to a lot of music. I’m not the type who plays the stereo (or rather ipod plugged into the speaker system — I love gadgets even if i don’t use them a lot) when I’m relaxing at home.

I find it somewhat distracting if I’m reading and I can’t really hear it unless I’m close to the speakers so there’s no sense in playing music if I’m cleaning as I need it at a volume that would distress my neighbours.

The only time I regularly listened to music was when I owned a car (I had a Pontiac Acadian and then an Oldsmoblie Calais) and I drove to school and work — over 15 years ago now. (Geez, now that’s a very poorly constructed sentence!)

As mentioned, I do have an ipod but I don’t wear it when I’m commuting. I have to wear earphones that go into my ear canal to get good sound. The sound is great but I can’t hear any outside noise such as cars, honking or people asking to be excused so they can get off the streetcar — so it’s just not safe or practical when I’m out and about. Plus, I have a fear of singing out loud unconsciously. I do this.

As a matter of fact, I’m singing out loud at the moment. For some reason, I’m in a musical mood tonight. Perhaps the two Caesars I had at dinner is a factor.

Tonight’s Playlist:

• The Rose — Bette Midler
• Don’t Cry for me Argentina — Madonna
• Saving Myself — Eria Fachin
• Oh Sherrie — Steve Perry
• To Sir With Love — Petula Clark
• The Tide is High — Blondie
• I love the Nightlife — Alicia Bridges
• Born in the USA — Bruce Springsteen
• Glory Days — Bruce Springsteen
  • BRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCE (Scarborough, remember?)
• Money Changes Everything — Cyndi Lauper
• I scooted by Echo & The Bunnymen — I just wasn’t in the mood for
  dumb lyrics that enchanted me as a teen
• Take a Letter, Maria — Gary Puckett & The Union Gap (why doesn’t
  he get together with Maria?)
• Hooked on a Feeling — B.J. Thomas
• I Beg Your Pardon (I Never Promised You A Rose Garden) — Loretta Lynn

And that’s it. I got bored…

I am a very hard worker. I’m not brilliant and I sometimes muddle through things but the fact that I try really hard makes a difference.

I’m interested in learning about things I don’t know and I feel real joy when a project goes well. At the same time, I’m afraid of failing and not meeting my goals. The key word here is my. My goals are sometimes too ambitious and quite often success is not in my hands alone. This can drive me nuts.

Plus, I am a worrier. I don’t go mad with worry but I do tend to dwell on things and try to figure out solutions. Sometimes they come to me at night and I get up, write them down, and put them in my bag. I can actually read these notes about half of the time — my handwriting is terrible — but I always remember what I was thinking.

I like to talk about my projects and explore all the angles — and I know I can go on…and on…

But I’m happy. I know I’m this way — I always have been. I’m not going to change and that’s okay.

Maybe I should have become a scientist or a doctor. Communications is not going to save the world or save a life. But this is what I chose and it’s important to me.

I’m not practicing for an interview (I’d leave out the part about the midnight notes if I were as that perhaps makes me sound a bit wacko) — I was just thinking about this tonight for some reason.

I joke about retiring at 40 to commit myself to writing but the reality is I could never stay home alone and type all day. I need to go to work and interact with people. I need meetings and projects and memos.

Something tells me that I better start planning a vacation.