Author: Christine Elias

I am not in a good mood. I’m getting over a cold and my acid reflux has been really acting up. Plus my toothpaste for sensitive teeth seems to be losing its efficacy. Not to mention I hate all the clothes in my closet. I can’t even listen to any depressing music as my stupid Bose iPod speaker died.

I might as well quit my job and move to Reykjavík — I do well in cooler climates.

I need a bath.

Okay, I’ve bathed and I feel better. It’s amazing what a little exfoliation can do for your spirits.

• My cold isn’t that bad. It’s almost gone and I didn’t get it nearly as bad as my wonderful friend at work. We blame the September influx of germs.
• Sometimes my stomach just acts up. I’m trying to suck it up (or spit it out) and deal.
• At least I have all my teeth.
• There is a new fashion season just around the corner. Fall clothes are my favourite.
• I like rock ballads not weepy-ass songs.
• I’d like to visit Iceland — briefly — and I’d like to stay in nice hotel.

And I’m really happy with my hair lately.

Today I went for a hypnosis consultation. I was originally going to get the consultation and a short trial session but I had a lot of questions and there wasn’t enough time to do a longer session (which costs the same but works better for smokers) as well.

Which is fine. I am happy I got to talk to the hypnotist for a good while. She was surprised at how much research I had done. She seemed quite knowledgeable plus she gets points for making me feel like a million bucks without even putting me in a trance.

Non-Kreskin-Like Woman: So how long have you been smoking?

Me: 25 years or so.

NKLW: Um, how long?

Me: 25 years I guess. Since I was a teenager — 14 or 15.

NKLK: (Looks at my info sheet )… how old are you?

Me: I’m 40.

NKLW: Wow. Some people look younger than their age. I mean I’m almost 40 and I can pass for my early 30s (she could) but you look like you are in your 20s. (I have not been told this before — usually I get 5 or so years younger — but I took it well.)

Me: (Floating without the benefit of hypnosis) Genes, I guess. Plus, I use an anti-aging skin cream that really is magical.

I know it’s sickening that I took such delight in this exchange. It’s not an accomplishment — it’s nothing I did. It really is genes and good luck.

I need more good luck for this hypnosis to work. It’s expensive but I’m going to give it a try. I’ve spent as much money on stupid things. Quitting is one of the smarting things I can do.